A Clear Winter's Day

I don't do this as often as I think I should or as often as I would like to. Life is so darned busy. Even when we make a concerted effort to slow down and step back a bit, it always seems like there is too much to do. I haven't figured out how to capture additional time in the day but if I do I will let you know.

I have however decided that it is important to capture "moments." Life is soooo short. Each time I consider that reality I am struck by how much I want(ed) to do in my life and how much remains yet undone!

We constantly explore notions of relocation. What we really want, both of us, is too slow down, taste life a bit more. We have wondered that if we moved further into the sticks if we would be less busy. Would we take more time to "smell the roses," take photos of them. We laugh because we imagine we would find a way to become "members" of something or other. We are activists. That's how we met!

But I think we need slow down and connect with our life. Each fast aspect of our life is necessary for other fast aspects to happen, and we have been fooled into thinking we need, or even must, be fast and have what the ‘fast life’ gives us. I do want to do the last third of my life differently. There is no going back. The timer does cannot be flipped back and forth like it can when you are playing pictionary. Once that sand starts falling it doesn't stop until it's all over. Slow is not about doing everything at a snail's pace; it's about working, playing and living better by doing everything at the right speed. The list of things I want to do far exceeds the time I have left. I feel a need to get on with it.

I want to live in an old beautiful farmhouse. Out away from town where we have a big garden and are more self sustaining than externally employed.

I want to have a horse and my own pack of dogs. I'm not a cat lover but we will probably need a couple in the barn.

I want a functional, heated shop that I can work in all year round. Build stuff. I LOVE tools!

I want to take pictures, long walks with my love and our pack.

I want him to have a big farmhouse Kitchen to make jams and pickles and explore his organic gardening. I want to take a month and go here, and then another month and go there and follow our hearts as long as we can keep filling the gas tank.

I want to sleep in every morning, nap when I feel like it and work til 2 am if my heart desires.

I want to pick blueberries and watch smoke rise up from the chimney and drink coffee in the sun room.

Go canoeing with my love and the dogs....in the silent early morning with mist rising on the river.

Spend time with my son and my grandchildren some day in the future.

This is not a huge list. None of these things are even expensive or unreasonably to consider. Truth is this old southern "Alberta" queer is more than ready to try living life differently. I really believe that we need to hit the dusty trail to make it happen. Here there is too much of our past ways and life to fall back into. We need a fresh and new start. Those "moments" I wanted to capture are out there. I am becoming less and less prepared to give them up.

But just so I am perfectly clear....Will I ever stop caring about and working for justice? Not likely. It's in my soul! I am who my God created me to be so as long as I have breath I suspect I will work toward a just and merciful world every time the opportunity arises.